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Thursday, January 5, 2012


I can be rolling along in my regular life, listening to music, painting the house, brushing the horse, helping the kids with something, and a sneaking feeling comes along that this can all change or be taken away from me in a second.  I know the stroke played havoc with my sense of security, my sense of living.  I still don't trust my body fully to keep me alive at any given point.  This is a natural thing and a natural course to our existence... that at some point we die.  My sense of security in my survival was not a reality, it is the nature of a finite life and lifespan that there is an end.   I am sure this will get easier the further I get away from my stroke, but sometimes it is an unbearable weight to carry.  It is probably why I stay so busy, the tricky thing is that fear usually comes out in some other way. 


  1. Andrea.. hopefully the fear will begin to subside soon. I do know what you are talking about. I went from one health crisis directly into another too and I think that really undermined my confidence that I would be okay. I think, with time, we get past the fear and hopefully keep the awareness of how precious every day is.

  2. Hey Linda,
    It is so nice to hear a) that this is normal and b) that it will lessen or go away altogether.
    You are several other readers have shared with me regarding this, and THANKS!!!!!!!!